Since we have formed this group, I have been thinking quite a bit about just what "webloveliving" or an at-one-with-nature life means to me. At first glance it seems to be a simple process. First I recognized that I could follow my natural attractions. Boy, has that changed my life!!! I think the most important way it has changed is by giving me permission to feel nature-connected independent of how things in life line up, or not, with what is expected. I cannot always do this yet, but when I get stuck in negative mental thinking, to be able to say "Does this line of thinking feel nature-connected?" and then let it go, if the answer is no, is really an amazing freedom.
Likewise with aspects of my life; if something isn't nature-connected, giving my self permission to move toward what would be attractive is so freeing. One by one I am giving up things that aren't in unity with nature. I realize that I am not really attracted to many things I thought I was.
Many Nature Activities have been and continue to be helpful to me in staying with nature-connection - the change of perspective one is the most useful right now.
Then came consent. That was a really difficult one for me. It sent me into long periods of depression, which I had to learn to escape using the attraction activities above. In my life I had learned that if one has to wait for consent one is in serious trouble. "No," was the mantra in my household growing up. And I had applied it to life in general - that life would say "no" and I would have to outfox it so how through a great deal of individual effort. Gradually I am understanding on an emotional level that the natural world is not withholding. Not wanting what doesn't want me has been a significant shift. I rarely push to "make things happen" now. I can only remember one time I've done that recently and it became sufficiently G/O to remind me that's now how things really work.
The challenge for me with consent has been more one of how do to things since I don't really know how I even want things to go in the future because it's not here yet. But that is easing now too.
I think trust is the growing edge now. Really trusting the attraction/consent process.
Not trusting that any particular thing will happen, but trusting that there is a way to feel right, good and welcome in this world without effort and struggle. Watching rather than envisioning. Finding rather than creating or making.
Tools of NSTP have been a great gift to me to understand how the rest of life works and to participate in learning how we too can live like the other creatures and beings on this Earth.
What a phenomenal relief! And still a phenomenal challenge, but one which like learning to walk, we are perfectly; equipped to undertake
It is in terms of such things as these that I will enjoy giving and receiving support and sharing. For I suppose like many others, I don't live in a community where the powers that be operate or support such a way of life. But there are many people here who do, or at least want to. Last night, for example, I enjoyed the most amazing experience. Someone who is close to me suddenly understood and embraced the concept of nature’s non-verbal intelligence attractions.! I had to stop my mouth for dropping open as this person has been quite adamant that there is no such thing and I have just let that be, just sharing and inviting but totally respecting the lack of consent.
I am filled with such hope and gratitude right now.
A REACTION: Since learning to learn through nature connecting activities, I feel so much more whole, creative and free...knowing that every time I step outside, there are infinite numbers of connections that can nourish and guide me. I would not want this taken away...and it is re-assuring to know that it can't be.
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