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June 24, 2005

Feeling as Part of the World

I went to my little nook on the hill and read (interestingly I didn't need my glasses today) and followed the book.  It seemed to take a little more than an hour, but time wasn't anything I noted until after I was done.  I felt a much deeper sense of belonging and contentment.  I very much felt that the Earth and I being the same was much more than a metaphor.  Through this reading it became real.

In hind sight I think my dog was trying to show me how great it was to be in nature.  For as I read and contemplated, she was doing drive byes on me.  She knew I was in between things and she'd come flying by and attack me, with love.  She'd then speed of a be gone for 10-15 minutes. As it was happening I just enjoyed it, but now I see her wisdom.  She's the consummate optimist, as an old family friend used to say it's a great day for the race!  We'd ask which race and he'd always say the human race, ain't that the truth.

I also had a clear vision and understanding that everything we as humans have done to make our lives easier has actually increased our stress and disconnected us from nature and our natural senses.  Almost every advance of modern man has been done to reduce our work load to give us more free time.  If we get any more help with our workload we won't be able to sleep; we won't have enough time. Instead of being freed by modern science we've become slaves of it.  I can't help but think that the movies of the robots taking over in the future aren't fantasy they're reliable predictions ; Even this computer we use to carry on this class is also a way to disconnect. If I feel stressed I can escape here rather than deal with it and the information available to me can even create more stress and/or distraction from the problem; the disconnection from nature.

What I found even more interesting was that I saw my self in balance, but at an unnatural place.  I'm balanced at a point of disequilibrium that doesn't include a balanced diet, enough exercise, or enough time outside (even though I've quadrupled my outdoor time and raised my connection when I'm there exponentially.)

I found myself seriously thinking about getting off the grid.  How can I live on my land without the power, water, or phone company. Could I raise most of my own food, how will I cook and still not pollute. Living simple disconnected from technology and connected to nature.

I walked home letting the natural attractions show themselves.  They said hi, we're glad you see up now with more than your eyes.

I learned to see myself more clearly today.  I could see myself as an integral part of nature with responsibilities to tend to the earth. I also keep seeing if I pay attention to nature, whether it is my dog or the wind I will at least, the very least feel love.

If we are in true balance, we see where we are, not where we'd like to be. Conservation is everyone's life's work. We can live with in our spiritual means and not spend a penny.

I feel more a part of the world.

A REACTION:  I am a trained scientist, only I got trained in plant and soil science, which supported the natural web of life attractions calling to me since arriving in this planet time. I see myself as someone who is capable of reintroducing the soul into science, which would probable balance the science and shaman inside of me...what a thought! THANKS!